"As skateboarding and ice skate are still growing, a new item of more cool body building and leisure, you can’t seize the wind of fashion .Hop, bowling, net bar, skating and dancing blanket are popular in short time. People will ask what’s the fashion next? Can you cater for it? The answer is crystal clear………."Does anyone actually read their spam anymore? Somehow an intriguing letter from a Chinese factory jumped into my work account today and led me to The FlyJumper. My theory is that foreign interpretations of the English language never get old.
Why just look at the function of this product:
"It’s the unique product that can promote your whole joints. Passed many tests with many people: the product has many functions: e.g. Helpful circulation of blood, Growing up, Reduce weight, Bodybuilding, Benefit to your intelligence, Eliminate hemorrhoids and so on."
It's got a great warranty, but "Contrived damage is not included the range of repair only, excluding slingshot."
The site also includes some good advice, like: "If you are fractured, injured by a fall, in the poor health condition, or reaction slowly, please don’t use it."
I also like that the link to the safety equipment is labelled "Kneecaps" -- makes sense...
3 comments:
I'm sold! I want a flyjumper really bad now, and not just because the fiction of reduce weight.
I'm having trouble growing up, so I think I'll get a Flyjumper to assist me.
this is totally mesmerizing and inspiring.
i just spent a half hour here in the PCL computer lab trying to figure out what this means: "Contrived damage is not included the range of repair only, excluding slingshot." So if I contrive damage to my slingshot, that IS included in the range of repair?
my favorite thing: "You can show your cool dancing to people when you wear it to dance hip-top. YOU WILL SHARE THE HAPPINESS WITH THE WORLD IF YOU WALK WITH IT." beautiful hyperbole, perhaps, but it definitely sold me! it makes it sound like jesus, only better because i don't have to be a christian. i can't wait to share the happiness with the world! plus, i spent a while trying to imagine what kind of rap sub-genre would be called hip-top.
in other news, i recently checked my spam email box and there was a message from one "mr. duffy" with the subject line "Erections are still Possible Maude." how bea arthur's fan mail ended up in my spam box i cannot tell you.
signed,
the girl who likes beautiful
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